Strong Emotions in Yoga

I want to dispel a myth. I want to dispel the idea that yoga 'should' be relaxing. That we 'should' feel calm and peaceful when we practice. Do we have beliefs around what we think a yogi is and feel we need to live up to this ideal? Of course all yogi's are calm and Zen like aren't they?

From the outside it may appear that we are Zen like but on the inside it's very often another matter! Just as strong physical sensations like pressure, squeezing, muscles tightening or releasing, can arise in the body when we move into an asana, strong emotions can also arise at any time during our practice. Even in Savasana when we are 'supposed' to be peaceful.

What is an emotion? Turns out it's a huge and complex subject. Here's a definition pulled straight out of Wikipedia: " Emotions are physical and mental states brought on by neurophysiological changes, variously associated with thoughts, feelings, behavioral responses, and a degree of pleasure or displeasure.^[1][2][3][4] There is no scientific consensus on a definition.^[5][6] Emotions are often intertwined with mood, temperament, personality, disposition, or creativity.^[7]"

And that was the simplest bit!

Buddhism might look at an emotion as a response triggered by some sort of sensory stimulation. The sensory input then triggers some sort of physical sensation in the body. Maybe I can use a simple example based on my own experience. I see the shiny silver foil I associate with chocolate bars scrunched up on the kitchen counter, my body responds. I feel a pull from the centre of my chest like a funnel pulling me towards the kitchen cupboards, the saliva glands kick in. My mind has joined in by now, "Oh I just fancy a nice bit of dark chocolate with my cup of tea" deluding myself that this is all my idea when in fact I'm just being driven by the feeling of desire/craving.

In the yoga class any number of things can trigger an emotional response, from a smell, a sound, a thought, an interaction, a feeling in the body. The examples are endless as we humans are complex beasties! We might feel frustration, anger, sadness, joy, fear, desire.

So we have the initial sensory trigger, followed by the emotional response.

Let's use anger as an example. Say you're in a yoga class and you've settled into a seated forward fold. Your teacher has just told you that forward folds are very calming but instead something has triggered anger in you. The strong sensation of anger is raging round your chest, your breath has become short and you feel very uncomfortable. Not only that but your mind is making things worse by telling you that you 'should' be calm! What do you do?

Option 1: leap up off your mat and start ranting and raging! Now don't get me wrong, there is a place for pillow pounding and the healthy expression of anger! However in the context of a yoga class it might not be a good idea as we have to consider what the impact our actions might have on others.

Option 2: Quietly suppress your rage. disassociate from the feelings of anger in your body, try not to feel them or think about them, grit your teeth, hold your breath, tighten your muscles, numb out. Anything other than feel those feelings!

This is not a good strategy, it never works. Remember this important teaching 'What you resist, persists.' You might be able to get through the class but you're just saving up your problems for another day as it will come up again, maybe even stronger next time.

Option 3: Recognise this feeling of anger in your body. "Anger I know you are there."

See if you can allow these sensations to be there, calmly and without judgement. They are just sensations, nothing wrong. You are safe.

This might be enough for you but maybe you can take it a step further and really feel what's going on in your body. How does this emotion actually feel? Is it hot or cold? Whereabouts in the body is it? Does it move? Does it stab/tingle/pulse, push, pull etc? Get curious about it without being reactive. See what happens. Do this to whatever extent you can.

Sometimes we might feel like we just don't have the capacity to really dive into the feelings/sensations of an emotion. In this case we would just focus a little more on something that felt safe such as softening the breath and breathing with the feelings.

"Anger I'll allow you to be there. I'm going to breathe with you."

The final step might be to remember that you are human, and that all humans struggle sometimes. You are not alone. Can you smile? Can you offer yourself some kindness?

"I'm only human, it's ok."

We used an example of a difficult emotion but we might also experience immense bliss or joy. We all want a bit of that don't we! It's ok to enjoy the joy, feel the bliss. We just need to be careful we don't set up the expectation that we 'should' be feeling this bliss during our practice. I fell into that trap in my early years of meditation practice by setting up the expectation that my practice wasn't a good one if I didn't fall into a state of deeply concentrated bliss. Let's enjoy pleasurable stuff whilst it's there, but not get attached to it as it too will change.

To bolster your ability to surf the waves of emotion, I highly recommend you practice the RAIN meditation. RAIN stands for Recognise, Allow, Investigate and Non-attachment or Nurture.

I like this version led by renowned mindfulness teacher Tara Brach

https://youtu.be/W8e_tAEM80k?si=oyH1nINlkjl_e87O

If you feel you need some extra support with this contact me to arrange a 1-1 so we can work through the process together. It's important to have the right tools in your toolbox so you can meet any challenging emotions with equanimity. The more often you do this the better you get at surfing the waves and the lighter and happier you become.